Here it comes again…The return of that hideous monster rearing its ugly head…
I got another intriguing question sent to my inbox and I felt it warranted a response as well. I’m going to withold the name, but here’s the question:
“My ex had a few very distasteful behaviors, a few of them shit tests. Things that eventually were deal breakers. We talked about it a few times, and it would be corrected and later return in a “new” form. She got the boot.
“Please advise, I’m interested in knowing more about shit tests and handling f-cked up behaviors from women.”
My Response:
First off, you made the right call in this relationship. You told her exactly the behavior you didn’t like and unfortunately, some bad habits die hard.
And hey, I have some bad habits that I need to kick, and I’m sure you do too.
We all do!
But if you are in a relationship with someone doing things that you can’t accept or live with, you owe it to yourself (and to the girl) to send her packing.
But here’s the deal…
I don’t think this girl was giving you the fabled “shit test”.
In fact, I don’t even really think shit tests exist!
Listen, women don’t just go up to random dudes and start testing them.
However, they will at times try to see if you really are what you claim to be in an interaction.
Why?
Because talk is cheap and every guy with a copy of “The Game” or “Double Your Dating” (or “insert favorite dating advice book here”) can merely spout of lines that might give the appearance of you being the high quality guy she craves.
But since it’s so easy to spew out this junk, women have gotten very accustomed to finding out if you can back up your words.
So she’ll test you…
Another mistaken case of the mythological “shit test monster” is the girl who just is lousy at flirting.
There’s a cognitive bias that we all have just due to us having “monkey brains” that cuase us to make mental errors. One of these biases is the “Halo Effect”.
The “Halo Effect” is one we assume because someone has one trait, in our case the woman is beautiful, she must have other traits too…in this case, she must be good at flirting.
But there’s no real link between the 2 qualities.
I’ve been engaged in many an interaction where the girl was being difficult and I had to remind myself that she is only trying to flirt with me…she just freakin’ sucks at it!
But to get to the real meat of how to respond to what might be mis-labeled a shit test, realize this:
You don’t have to respond to everything she says or does!
When confronted with objectionable behavior early on, I have always found it best just not to play into it one bit.
I won’t acknowledge it for a second.
And fairly quickly she realizes she is not having her “normal affect” using her otherwise clever ruse on me.
The reason I can do this is when a girl is testing me, I know that it’s only because she’s into me at this point.
She wouldn’t do this to just some schlub on the street after all.
So don’t sweat it.
Just keep on escalating that interaction…
Get Some!
Nick Rogue
PS…Want to use material that will make her want to find out if you really are the sexual man you are trying to convey?
Want to learn how to escalate every interaction to the bedroom?
And do you want to do it all as quickly and effortlessly as possible?
Then you might want to check this out:
